I HATE what you're WEARING

This photo is a special case. I’ve sent it to several people who have identified multiple offending articles including, but not limited to, faux concert t-shirt, camo cargo shorts, and slip-on sandals. None of them, however, managed to pick up on the fact that the “gentleman” in the middle of the frame is wearing BUNNY EARS. I’m chalking this up to the scale of their screens, not the fact that they consider this normal behavior. Thank god for that new iPhone LongPhone. 

Oh my god! Taylor Momsen! What are you doing here at the Summit train station? Oh, I’m sorry, I saw all the black and the stringy hair and the nutso shoes and I thought you were Taylor Momsen, honest mistake. I’m going to leave you alone with your cell phone and your PowerAde…your vibe is really bringing me down.

Plaid on plaid on plaid! Bad on bad on bad on bad! Seriously buddy, one plaid per outfit, please.

Girlfriend, I love the way you’re embracing all the challenges the world is throwing at you. It’s so important to look to the future while remembering your roots. Thank god you’ll always have a permanent reminder of that fun time you got grammatically incorrect tattoo. Carpe Diem!

Let’s start with a classic. The Surf Club is always rife with fresh hate-able material to document, but honestly. What. The fuck. Is that. I didn’t even know it was possible to pierce that part of your body. I’m pretty sure that a) those pants are made of Glad trash bags trimmed with the leftover costume materials from a 5th grade production of Cleopatra, b) I had a t shirt with that cat motif from Limited Too, and c) this girl feels like Kim Kardashian. I’m sorry if your corneas are bleeding but I  had to get this over with.